TYG- Megan Thee Stallion (feat. Spiritbox)
It’s vacation-eve!
Usually, I update my blog on Wednesdays (at least I try to) but, today, I figured I would do it a day early as I’m taking a little mini-vacay the rest of the week. Where am I going? Nowhere. Ya girl is staying her butt at home with no shoes, no bra, and, hell, maybe even no pants. We’re talking full Pooh Bear. Because I’m an adult and my roommates are out of town. I’m so ready to relax and not be at work, but I somehow think I’ll still feel a little guilty for it. Nothing out of the ordinary there.
Today, I am going to treat you with a rant. This has been something on my mind for the past week, and has been something I’ve grit my teeth over the entire time. Let’s jump right into it.
I am in several writing groups on Facebook, one of those being a self-publishing support group, which is all well and good, until it isn’t. Someone posted a question in the group- “Do you use trigger warnings in your books and, if so, where do you put them?” This started off a discussion that had me absolutely fuming. The amount of holier-than-thou writers that were foaming at the mouth to scoff at such an idea was honestly a little alarming. Hot takes such as “literature has existed for x number of years, why should I add trigger warnings?” and “throw them in the bin where they belong.” I won’t bore you with the rest. 147 comments, the majority of them from men bashing the use of content warnings in writing.
If you look above in my taskbar, you will see a webpage labeled “Content Warnings” where I list warnings for each project I’m working on. I do this because I care about my readers and I know who I market to. I market to women, and some of those women may be the victim of some sort of traumatic event in their lives. I pointed this out- that people had piss-poor attitudes about something they don’t have to include but choose to insult writers that do. And that opened the floodgates. I’m sure I could write a paper on the correlation between male writers, toxic masculinity, and self-importance, but I don’t think I would survive it. The number of egotistical responses I got from men for that comment had my blood boiling. One of the responses was something about trigger warnings dulling the emotional impact of my story, which is complete bullshit, and then going on to say that, basically, people suffering from mental health issues shouldn’t read things that could potentially upset them.
If you look above in my taskbar, you will see a webpage labeled “Mental Health Support” where I have all sorts of links to sites and numbers for help if you need help. It’s 2024. Why are we still struggling to understand that people come from difficult situations and may need just a smidgeon of compassion? Should people with depression or anxiety just not be allowed to read? Are neurodivergent people not allowed to consume media because it could be difficult for them?
I don’t like men. I think I’ve disliked men my entire life, because they keep proving me right. The same poster that posted the original question asked the same thing in a group in which only women are allowed and the responses were like night and day. Yes! Yes, add them if you feel you need them! If it could hurt them, warn them! I think something of this stems from society’s expectation that men always have to be tough, men don’t cry or show their feelings, men don’t have mental health issues because that’s for girls. We set unhealthy expectations on men and, suddenly, compassion for others is a weakness. It’s a real problem. I can dislike men and, in the same breath, scream at the top of my lungs that these motherfuckers need therapy and to cry and laugh without someone mocking them for it.
To wrap this up- I left the group. I stopped responding to the asinine comments and just peaced out. At the end of the day, nothing I say will have enough of an impact on them to make them reconsider, and I don’t really want to be the person demanding they use trigger warnings. That wasn’t the point. The point is that content warnings don’t make your writing any less emotionally impactful, and that you can still write a damn good story while having warnings at the beginning.
